Sharenting
Sharenting—what’s that? You might be asking the same question I did. Honestly, I didn’t know what it meant until I came across a short documentary on the topic. It struck me as so relevant that I felt it was worth writing a blog post about.
In simple terms, sharenting refers to parents publicly sharing details about their children online—things like photos, videos, milestones, or personal stories—usually on social media. The word itself is a mix of “sharing” and “parenting.” At its core, it describes how moms and dads create a digital footprint for their kids, sometimes years before those children are old enough to choose for themselves.
By age 5 the average kid has 1500 photos of them online, yes this is an American study and yes, this might be less in Europe, but the issue remains the same, we parents post pictures of our children without their consent and that’s only part of the issues.
We didn’t realize it at the time. I’ll admit, I was guilty of this myself. When Facebook first came out around 2006, our first child was just a year old. Everything about it was new and exciting. It felt so natural—and even fun—to post our children’s photos online, especially back then, when we usually only had a small circle of friends, mostly those living in other countries, sharing our lives made us feel closer.
It was only later that we heard more and more about the dangers, such as:
Privacy and Data Security
Sharing photos online can unintentionally expose sensitive data about a child’s identity, location, and daily life. Modern smartphones and social platforms often attach metadata (like GPS coordinates and timestamps) to images, which criminals can exploit to track a family’s whereabouts and routines. Even if parents don’t explicitly mention their location, hidden data in photos or the background details can reveal it. This means an innocent “first day of school” picture (with a school name/logo in view or location tags enabled) might give a stranger the information needed to find that child in real life.
Another growing danger parents often overlook is facial recognition and data mining. The moment you post a picture of your child, you lose control over where that image may end up. Social media isn’t just about friends and family scrolling past — tech companies (and sometimes shady actors) are constantly scraping photos from the internet.
Research shows nearly 80% of parents have social media contacts they don’t actually know in real life. That means even your “friends-only” posts might not be as private as you think.
And here’s another piece most parents miss: when you upload a photo to a platform, you often give the company broad rights over that image. In other words, once it’s out there, your child’s photo might be floating in places you never intended.
That could never happen to us. We’re just a normal family—we’re not famous, and we’re definitely not rich. Why would anyone ever target us? Maybe no one. Maybe someone. But ask yourself: do you really want to risk your child’s photos showing up anywhere, without your control—and worse, without your child’s consent because they were too young to give it? Our kids grow up. One day we’ll stand in front of them and answer for what we shared.
As missionaries, we send newsletters to our friends and supporters. I’ve made it a habit to ask our kids first before including their photos in them. Was that my brilliant idea? Sadly not. They told me they weren’t happy with some of the pictures I had posted and wanted to be asked first. That was hard to hear, but they were right. It's their story too.
Their honesty really humbled me. It reminded me that our children aren’t just extensions of our ministry or part of our updates — they’re real individuals with their own voice, their own dignity, and their own story.
What I saw as just an innocent little snapshot, they experienced as a breach of trust. And honestly, that hit me. When I slowed down, really listened, and made changes, I wasn’t just fixing a mistake — I was showing them something deeper: that their voices matter, and their boundaries are worth protecting.
It’s not always convenient, but it’s worth it. Because if I can’t honour their 'no' in something as small as a photo, how can I expect them to trust me with the bigger issues in their lives? This might seem blown out of proportion to you, but one of our main goals as parents is to become our children’s trusted confidants—the ones they feel safe enough to talk with about everything. But here’s the danger: when we keep making decisions on their behalf with no real benefit to them, we risk breaking that trust. They will grow up and eventually discover what we’ve posted about them—often in those delicate teenage years, when we should be strengthening the very foundation we laid in their childhood. And something as simple as the many post, done without their consent, can be the thing that cracks it.
And let’s be real about sensitive data and whereabouts. A fellow student once told me about a well-known Instagrammer in their Barcelona apartment complex. She happily posted that she was away on vacation. Thieves saw the posts, put two and two together, and broke into her apartment. That’s how fast “just sharing” online can turn into a real-world risk—not only for her, but for others too. Once the thieves were inside the building, they could easily check which other apartments were empty. My Spanish friend said she no longer felt safe in her own home.
We often tell ourselves, “That kind of thing will never happen to us.” But let’s be honest — none of us are untouchable. Let’s choose to be wise, not naïve.
But let's consider another dark danger:
Exploitation and Grooming
This isn’t theoretical. Predators regularly steal family photos, including fully clothed pictures, and recirculate them in dark corners of the internet. Some create fake profiles, others trade images. When you post publicly, you may be supplying content to people you’d never willingly meet.
AI makes it worse. Offenders can use innocent family photos to generate deepfake images—convincing fakes that place a child in sexualized scenes. Once created, these files spread fast and are nearly impossible to erase.
Groomers (people who try to gain a child’s trust for the purpose of exploitation) can also use these images as tools. For example:
Building trust with a child – They might say, “I saw your picture online, you look so grown up!” to flatter and break down boundaries.
Pretending to be safe – They might use personal family photos to create a sense of false familiarity, making a child think, “They know about me, they must be trustworthy.”
Targeting families – They might follow accounts that post many child pictures to learn routines, hobbies, schools, or locations.
Even “innocent” photos—like a child in sports clothes, in a school uniform, or at the beach—can be taken out of context and used wrongly.
In short: what starts as a sweet family moment can, in the wrong hands, become a tool for exploitation or grooming. Awareness is the first step to protecting our kids.
And these are just a glimpse of the many risks that can come from sharing our children’s lives online.
Most of our kids are “online” before they’re even born. We post ultrasound pictures, newborn photos, birthday cakes, and first-day-of-school shots. By the time they’re teenagers, thousands of images of them may already exist online—and none of them were posted by the child themselves.
What feels cute to us now can be deeply embarrassing later. I’ve heard kids say they resent the fact that their life was put on display without them ever being asked. And I get it. Imagine being 15 and your classmates dig up that potty-training story or meltdown video. What we thought was “funny” in the moment becomes their shame.
Here’s what I’ve learned: respect goes a long way. Too many of us don’t even ask our kids if they’re okay with us posting a picture, we didn’t. And some keep posting even after their child said no. That breaks trust.
Think about it—what is your posting habit? Do you share every cute moment, every milestone, every funny mishap, without pausing to ask if this is really honoring your child? What might seem harmless or even sweet today could become a source of embarrassment, shame, or even danger tomorrow.
Ask the Holy Spirit now. Because the truth is, your child is most likely not old enough to understand the impact—but you are. You’ve been entrusted with wisdom and discernment. Your choices today build either trust or distrust, safety or exposure.
This is not about fear; it’s about stewardship. God has given you these children to protect, to cover, and to raise in dignity. Before you hit “post,” ask yourself: Does this honor my child? Does this reflect God’s heart for them? Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is to keep the moment just for your family, tucked away in memory rather than displayed to the world.
Law and Ethics: Where the Culture Is Heading
The world is waking up to this. More and more countries are giving kids the legal right to demand that platforms delete their photos. Courts are starting to recognize that a child’s dignity matters more than a parent’s impulse to post.
But honestly, even if there weren’t any laws, we still have to ask ourselves: Whose good is this serving—my child’s or mine? If it’s mainly about validation, likes, or building some image, we’re on the wrong track.
We’re not owners of our kids—we’re stewards. God entrusted them to us. And good stewardship means erring on the side of privacy and restraint.
Here’s a simple test: Would you be okay with that picture and caption plastered on a billboard in your town—today and ten years from now? If not, don’t post it.
Psalm 127:3 says, “Children are a heritage from the Lord.” That means they’re precious gifts, not props for our feeds. Our job is to protect their dignity, not parade their lives.
Jesus gave a sobering warning: “Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea” (Matthew 18:6). Those words remind me that protecting our kids’ innocence isn’t optional—it’s a sacred duty.
And Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 13 that love “does not seek its own.” That means my social media shouldn’t seek clout at my child’s expense.
So if you’re unsure? Choose the narrow road. Share less. Protect more. Let your kids grow up with privacy, integrity, and the freedom to tell their story when they’re ready.
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