When Gratitude Becomes a Lifestyle
How was your Thanksgiving?
I know many of you are in countries where Thanksgiving isn’t part of the culture, so it just passes like any other day.
Maybe you’ve only seen it in American movies: the huge turkey, the perfectly decorated table, the dramatic family arguments, and the slow, emotional “I’m thankful for…” speeches at the end.
For others, it’s just a normal Thursday in November.
I get both sides. I’m half American, but I didn’t grow up in the middle of big, traditional Thanksgiving gatherings. I grew up in Switzerland. Thanksgiving was something I knew about, but it wasn’t something we marked in our calendar every year.
That changed when another American family, who we knew well, moved closer to our home in Switzerland. Suddenly, these American traditions started to land in our real, everyday life.
They brought their recipes, their stories, their way of celebrating… and slowly, Thanksgiving started to become part of our rhythm and now also of our family.
We’ve celebrated Thanksgiving in so many different ways and places:
in Switzerland with family and friends,
in the Caribbean with their amazing local food,
in Barcelona with an American community,
in America with Brazilian friends,
and this year, a little early, with our dearest pastors here in France.
They’ve all been such unique and unforgettable experiences.
It’s not about a perfect Thanksgiving
We now have adult and teenage children, so our celebrations are full of helping hands and no more tantrums.
But it wasn’t always like that. There were years where I could barely find time to cook, little ones hanging on my legs, Thanksgiving meals constantly interrupted because the children didn’t want to sit or eat, the table noisy, messy, and my heart somewhere between gratitude and wanting to cry in the kitchen. “Will anything I’m teaching them ever really take root?”
I’ve asked myself that question so many times.
I am so deeply grateful for the mentors who kept telling me, “Just keep sowing, don’t stop.”
Looking back now, I can see it was so worth it.
Many of you reading this don't live in the US. You might be thinking:
'Thanksgiving isn't really our thing. We don't celebrate that holiday here.'
OK.
But here’s what I want to say as clearly as possible:
You don’t need turkey, pumpkin pie or an American passport to live a life of gratitude.
The Bible doesn’t tell us to give thanks on one particular Thursday each year; it calls on us to ‘give thanks in all circumstances’ – not because life is always good, but because God is good.
Gratitude is not an American tradition; it's a Kingdom lifestyle.
What Gratitude does
When we sit down and actually start to think about what we are thankful for, it does something inside of us. We hope it magically changes our attitude, but it also exposes.
Our disappointments
Our hidden expectations
Our sense of entitlement
Our fear that “it’s not enough”
We suddenly realise how quickly we complain, how easily we compare, and how rarely we stop to notice what God has already done.
And honestly? Sometimes gratitude feels hard.
Not because we don’t have anything to be grateful for, but because the pain is louder than the blessing in that season.
You don’t need to deny any of the hard God is not asking you to fake it.
But there is something powerful, almost rebellious, about saying:
“Lord, this year was not easy. But I still choose to see Your goodness. I still choose to thank You.”
That’s not a religious performance; that’s spiritual warfare. It's about renewing your mind, not focusing on what you see or feel immediately in front of you, but on who He is and what He is about to do. That's faith spoken out.
Bringing Thanksgiving Into Your Home (Even If You Don’t Celebrate the Holiday)
So whether you had a full Thanksgiving feast, completely ignored it, or live in a country where it doesn’t even exist on the calendar — here’s my challenge:
What if your family decided to practice gratitude on purpose, make it a Lifestyle.
Not once a year, not once in a while… but as a rhythm.
Here are a few simple, realistic ways to do that in a Christian home:
1. The “One Thing Today” Question
At dinner or before bed, ask each other:
“What’s one thing you’re thankful to God for today?”
Not ten things. Just one.
Keep it simple enough that even a tired teenager or a grumpy parent can answer.
Over time, this shifts the atmosphere of the home. It trains hearts to notice God, not just problems.
2. A Family “Gratitude Jar”
Put a simple jar in the middle of your home – on the table, a shelf, the kitchen counter – and turn it into your Gratitude Jar.
Keep some small papers and pens next to it. All year long, invite everyone in the family to write short thank-you notes to God and put them in the jar:
“Thank You Lord for healing my headache.”
“Thank You for my friend at school.”
“Thank You for our home.”
“Thank You that Dad got this new job.”
You can make it a little ritual:
After dinner, everyone writes one thing they’re thankful for.
When something special happens, pause and say, “Let’s put it in the jar.”
Then, on a special moment (New Year, a family night, or when you’ve had a hard week), open the jar together and read the notes out loud. It’s a powerful way to remember:
We forget fast, but God has been faithful again and again.
The Gratitude Jar becomes a visible testimony in your home:
even in ordinary, messy days, God has been good to our family.
3. Gratitude in Prayer (Not Just Requests)
Most of our prayers (if we’re honest) are lists of needs:
“Lord, please do this… fix that… help here… provide there…”
I love this powerful Biblevers:
(Psalm 100:4 NIV)
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
How do we enter His Presence with Thanksgiving and Praise.
Before we rush into “God, please,”
we stop and say, “God, thank You.”
It recalibrates the heart.
When Gratitude Becomes a Lifestyle, Your Whole Home Changes
When gratitude is cultivated intentionally, it has the power to change your family atmosphere from the inside out, again, it’s not about thanksgiving or not, but about an attitude of the heart and a family.
We live in a culture where complaining is normal.
Kids whine. Parents get exhausted. Days feel heavy.
And we almost start to believe this is just how family life is.
But here's the truth: gratitude is a powerful tool.
This is one of the most effective ways to change the atmosphere in your home.
When we practice gratitude — as individuals and as families — we’re not just “being positive.” We are actually aligning our hearts with Heaven.
Gratitude opens the door to God’s presence.
And when His presence fills a home, everything changes — the atmosphere, the relationships, the way we respond to pressure.
Our children won’t naturally wake up thankful. You’ve probably already experienced that.
While we might be very frustrated about our children, it starts with us.
With what we model every single day.
If I’m constantly focused on what’s missing, my kids will learn to do the same.
But when I slow down, notice the good, and speak gratitude out loud — even for the small things — they begin to mirror that posture of the heart.
We’re training their hearts to see God’s goodness all around them, even in the little, ordinary moments.
But let’s be honest… how quickly do we start complaining?
About the dirty laundry that never ends.
The meals we have to cook again.
The toys scattered all over the floor.
The lack of sleep.
The never-ending to-do list.
Not having enough time for ourselves.
What tone dominates our home?
We’re quick to see the lack of gratitude in our children, but much slower to notice it in ourselves.
Ask the Holy Spirit to put His finger on it. How is my heart doing? Am I grateful?
Here’s the beautiful thing: gratitude doesn’t just change behavior — it changes the atmosphere.
A thankful home feels different.
There’s less tension.
More connection.
More joy.
And everyone feels it.
If your home has felt heavy lately… if there’s been a lot of complaining, whining, or stress… I want to encourage you: start small.
Let gratitude start with you and spread to your family. Children find it much easier to model what they see in front of them than to follow a parent speaking about a concept that is only theory for them. Let's not make it harder for our children to learn — let's start right here, with us.
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